this way is up

Hey curvy curlies! I'm writing this blog from my couch. I'm on steroids with a heating pad cradled against my neck. For the last several months, I've had moments of excruciating pain on the left side of my neck, shoulder blade and left arm.  I've ingested every over-the-counter pain killer imaginable - all with minimal results. Thankfully, I was recently diagnosed with a disc issue and treatment will begin in a few days.

I was ecstatic to finally have an understanding of what was happening, but child, it took a second to sink in because I've been walking around completely convinced that I was having a cardiac episode. Yup. Went all the way to the worst case scenario(s), even though I've been able to workout and live without any other symptoms. I had a stress test and ct scan, both ruling out coronary issues or blood clots. So what. In my mind, my GP and the specialists couldn't possibly know what they were talking about. Humph, the expertise of WebMD said what I was experiencing was indicative that death was nigh.


Why is it so easy to embrace the worst case, but reject the better one? How is it that bad news is so all consuming, but the moments of grace and light, we handle with fleeting excitement? Think about it, when we have a scare of any sort, we solicit prayers but sleep with worry. We essentially fantasize about the bleakest outcome. Just look at social media. The hashtags that get the most traction are typically the ones attached to a tragedy or humor. In the vein of complete transparency as it relates to social, I have waaaay more sarcastic and shady quips that I consider posting than I actually do. I mean, I post quite a few, and dang it, I'm funny! But, as an act of my will and commitment to my brand, edification and useful nformation must outweigh the negative.

Over the next seven days, I would like to ask you to be my accountability partners. I am determined to keep my head to the sky so I am challenging myself to reside in an "attitude of gratitude" bubble. If - nope- When I get frustrated, I'm going to think about something great, and that "great" thing might be how fly my nail polish is (sometimes you have to love on the little things). I'm going to focus on it, write it down, tweet it, etc. and let it center me in my blessings. If you read anything out of pocket from me, I want you to remind me how good my/our/this life really is.