body (brand) compromise or evolution?

I was inspired to write this after reading several blogs about fat bashing, dieting and body policing. The posts published by my fellow curvy bloggers could not have been timelier!

I am new to several spaces, including; blogging, natural hair tutorials, and the curvy girl movement. In developing my brand, I wanted to be sure to celebrate an aesthetic that is synonymous with me (Lila) - natural hair, fashion, and some junk in the trunk. It is equally important to be my most authentic self.

Here’s the thing, I was SUPER conflicted about stepping into this discussion. I was actually in a weight management group trying to get my cute on, when I first began birthing Curvy Girls N Curls. I was literally wrestling with losing weight, versus eating whatever wasn't nailed down, because, after all, curves (and extra padding and stuff) was good for my brand. Right? I mean, how can I talk about curvy, curly anything and I'm working out and portion controlling and attempting to lose weight? Real wrong.

Listen, I’m not really moved by numbers – the size tag or the scale numbers - not really. BUT, there is a point for me, where I am uncomfortable, and whether I (you) like it or not, that uncomfortable feeling correlates directly to that number on the scale. I hear women say they don’t weigh, they just measure by how clothes fit. When my cAute leather leggings are too tight in the waist, or a dress is now a tunic (over said leggings) because my romp hikes it up too far in the back, (I can’t get no help in here) it is due to that scale readout, you know, the one that I’m not moved by. Sigh.

I was compelled to express my feelings on this matter, because my weight sitch is an on-going evolution for me. I like me. I like my ideals. I like my sensibilities. I like my style. I do not, however, like the havoc hormones, stress and age has wreaked on my body. I do like my booty. I’m not in love with my arms. I love my smile. My tummy could be tighter. These high cheekbones are pretty fierce. The thighs could use some squats. My boobs, well, they addS to the curvy – I ain’t mad. My point is, no matter where we are in our journey, there will likely be some things that we adore about ourselves and other things, not so much. I am a huge proponent of loving yourself completely. I am equally concerned about self-care, including; healthful eating, a fitness regimen and preventative care.

My plea; love and care for yourselves. Do not fall victim to the anti-black hypnosis and European beauty standards. There is something amazing and lovely that emanates from confident women. It’s called beauty. For me, that confidence is off the charts when I’m walking in my authenticity and that includes taking good care of this aging body.